I am tired~~

A lot of things happen recently... no matter is bad or good, I try hard to be strong to face it and solve all of that... I had insomnia for a week more, thought that I could sleep well after today function... but the conclusion is, I fail to fall asleep again... Why? at first, I thought that could be the stress that I give to myself... but it seems like I am wrong... what is the reason that I cant sleep well actually? Myself also dont know why... huh... Start to busy about my thesis, seems like a lot of things gonna settle... What a busy year end for myself, what a busy December for me... I am tired to have a good rest I am tired to be strong I am tired to be alive the higher the expectation, the higher the dissapointment Dont expect too high on me, ok? I am not super girl, I dont know how to fly in the sky I am not that clever, I dont know how to show that I am innocent I am not that strong, I always cry when I am alone even that I smile all the time I am not that cruel, I care you more than anything even I always ignore you when you talk to me I am not that easy to forget about the past, I remember every single moment with you even it had been ages I am not the fish, I dont know how to swim freely in the water and I will drown if you leave me alone I am tired to be stay awake in these days I am tired to be alive in this world

是爱了还是习惯了？

人，往往因为爱所以习惯 渐渐的，习惯让人迷失了爱 到底，是爱了还是习惯了？ 最终，没有答案 迷茫中 人会怀疑自己的爱 其实， 爱久了 就是习惯 习惯久了，就是爱 两者的差别，有吗？ 爱上了一个人，21天 你就会习惯的去爱他 习惯了一个人，21天 你就会习惯的自己生活 到底，习惯和爱该如何区别？ 只要对方能够幸福快乐 爱又算什么？

我...........累了！！！！

我要学会自私，好吗？ 我要学会软弱，可以吗？ 我要学会不再坚强，能吗？ 我不想再继续伪装自己...因为我并不是 我只想当个什么都不懂的人 以为自己可以扛下许多的东西，但都不能 总觉得我有责任把所有的事情都搞定，但我没办法 别人都确认我是个女强人，更告诉自己我绝不可以倒下 但，我.............累了 好想告诉全世界，我不管了 好希望自己可以优哉游哉... 背上的扛着的袋子，已经满到溢出来了 小叮当的魔法也用完了 再也变不出任何法宝了

Sorry That I Loved You

heard this song from my friend's blog, it is so nice... it make me think of many people who loved me and I loved Why we have to say sorry for our love? Especially when we love someone that we are not suppose to... "I'm sorry that I loved you, and sorry that I love you... and so sorry that I will still love you no matter how in future..." Love doesn't meant to say sorry It meant when you meet the one who melt you heart while you just looking in his eye, and he say nothing It meant when you found someone who worth your love It meant when you can hold him tight no matter what is going on in your life It meant when you found someone that you would like to share each other life with him, and his too It meant when you both depends on each other It meant when you are not affordable to lose him, and his too It meant when you meet the one that make you feel so proud and so warm to say "I DO" It meant when I met you It meant when I chose to leave It meant when I read the happiness in your life now It meant when I knew that my decision was right It meant when I learn to be independent It meant when I hide all my feeling It meant when I just simply say "hello, how are you? I'm fine." It meant when I think of us, there are no more tears rolling out... but just the memory deep in my heart

Sorry That I Loved You

Sorry That I Loved You

For all the times that I tried for your smile For making you think that I was worth the while So your love love love love love would be mine

For sending you flowers and holding your hand That no one was there to take a stand But when love love love made us blind

And I'm so sorry that I hurt you Sorry that I fell through Sorry I was falling in love with you Im sorry that it came true but sorry doesn't turn back time For all that I could make it right So sorry that I loved you Sorry that I held you tight

And Im so sorry for... Making you love me and saying goodbye For being the one that taught you how to cry It was love love love and it passed us by

For giving you everything that you dreamed For taking it back when I fled the scene Sorry love, for wasting your time

And I'm so sorry that I hurt you Sorry that I fell through Sorry I was falling in love with you Im sorry that it came true but sorry doesn't turn back time For all that I have done to you I wish that I could make it right So sorry that I loved you Sorry that I needed you Sorry that I held you tight

An apology now after all of this time Won't make any difference tonight But Im hoping "Im sorry" will open your mind To love love love love in your life

Sorry that I hurt you Sorry that I fell through Sorry I was falling in love with you Im sorry that it came true but sorry doesn't turn back time For all that I could make it right (tonight) So sorry that I hurt you Sorry that I fell through Sorry I was falling in love with you (I was falling in love) Im sorry that it came true but sorry doesn't turn back time

I'm sorry that I loved you I'm sorry that I hurt you I'm so sorry that I loved you I'm so sorry that I hurt you

I'm sorry that I loved you

学会了，看清了，都懂了

觉得自己离开了好久好久 但是，似乎没有发现我的离开 是好事？还是坏事？ 代表，在这个世界我已经没有牵挂了？ 代表，在这个世界我根本就不重要？ 学会了，看清了，都懂了 当你已经变成对方的过去后，就要努力的将对方变成你的过去 不留痕迹的 把所有过去的记忆都一并消除干净 学会了伪装 无论有多在意，都不要表露 无论有多讨厌，也要笑脸迎迎 做作，是现今社会的一门重要学问 不要让别人知道，你要的是什么，你想的是什么 你就减低了让别人利用，让别人当救生圈的机率了 看清了世界 无论多难挨，也要撑下去 无论多快活，都不可以炫耀 低调，是必然的 不要炫耀自己，不要低估自己 不要让敌人知道你有多少的底牌 不要让敌人知道就算你多么的难过 都懂了因果 因果循环是存在的 种什么因，就会的什么果 过去的我，造就了现在的我 而现在的我即将造就未来的我 如果，我还不学着改变 我的未来会依然被我的过去充斥着 一步一步的走向未来 只有自己的未来